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ninety seven, ninety sex, oops


funny, stories, comedy, mathematics,







ninety nine, ninety hate, ninety seven, ninety sex, oops

I wish to introduce myself: Count Backwards Von Hundred, (mathematician, cyclist, mountaineer), Google Algorithm Mountain View, Near Vienna (but not very), Austria. It iss 300 metres as the eagle glides from my study window to the neighbouring castle. The neighbour being Countess Sigmundina Freud, of Bosom Mountain, Near Vienna (but not very), Austria. However, the journey iss 49% downhill, 49% uphill, and only 2% bearable. It totals sixteen kilometres by bicycle. I haff to cycle to Countess Sigmundina’s place twice per week (except in August) for therapy for the condition of bosom envy. Countess Sigmundina Freud is herself vell endowed in the chest area and I’m convinced the vitch iss deliberately teasing me. Now she says I haff an allergy to tea. Apparently it iss caused by drinking too much tea, which iss itself a bosom substitute. I haff to abstain from tea and all thoughts of sex for twelve months; she makes me so MAD. To cope with this I haff to repeat certain affirmations that Countess Sigmundina has devised. Part 1:


All iss vell in this beast ov all possible vorlds. Now for the hard part. Much concentration iss needed for

part 2 … Nein tea, nein, Nein tea, hate, Nein tea, seven, Nein tea, sex, Oops. Start again … P.S. For a break, I volunteered to be admin for the Wit’s End e-Community during my August holiday and I vas promised a rent-free room in Bude as a reward. Bude by the sea! Now I arrive and find Mademoiselle Mind-Games, alias Countess Sigmundina Freud, is also here! The summer residence of the vitch. Ein photo is on dis blog.

later: I shall retire to my drawing room and find solace in the playing of my piano. My current favourite is Bark’s testimony to celibacy, The 48 Fig Leaves and Prudes. My favourite iss 38D (No 38 in D major).

zat iss all four now,

Count Backwards


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