(To the tune 'Jesus loves me...')

( 4/4 // G / C G / G / C G D G // )

(major sevenths for verses 2 & 4)

England sparkles, this I know.

The Daily Mail tells me so.

And every time that I feel bad,

They point me to the latest fad.

I fear my mind amounts to nought,

The daily papers form my thought.

My heart is not entirely real,

Soap operas tell me how to feel.

England sparkles, this I know.

The Daily Mail tells me so.

And every time that I feel bad,

They point me to the latest fad.

Is every thing as it should be?

My world and I in harmony?

Sometimes I feel emerging doubts,

I read some junk to blot them out.

Yes, every time that I feel low,

I'll read more lies, my mind to blow.

I'm content with the status quo,

The Daily Mail tells me so.